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I do
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What do diapers do for anxiety?
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marcella brinkley When I was young there was a joke about a book title and author: "Thirty Yards to the Outhouse," by Willie Makeit.
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My mother is 95 years old and she tears off clothes, everything even the sheets. Does anyone know of something she could hold or what can we do about this?
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I do. It works very good, my diaper is like a varm carress. I recommend a regular use,. Try it! And dont feel foolish, we are many into this Lifestyle. There are many communitys around the world to join. Search and you Will find others with the same solution for those problems.
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When I was in kindergarten--long ago--if you had a noticeable "accident" they would give you a clean pair of pants and thick cotton institutional diaper briefs (heavy-duty training pants) to wear underneath, that you got to wear home. I remember being thoroughly impressed by these--underwear that actually worked!--as I had to wear too-small hand-me-down briefs with an unmanageable fly (or too large, stained, holey) that did practically nothing. I was disappointed that I wasn't allowed to keep the diaper briefs, and ridiculed for wanting to. "Repeat offenders" were obliged to bring extra clothes from home to have on hand--a further embarrassment--and just having to go to the bathroom was frowned upon, so I learned to suppress urges--but at the cost of continual physical distress and diverted attention that was seen as "daydreaming." This continued through the rest of elementary school--you had to keep your shirt tucked-in at all times, so there was little chance of hiding anything, and bathroom breaks were scheduled--kids would be peeing on the floor as soon as they got in the bathroom door. Looking back, it's clear that I wasn't alone, that this predicament was fairly universal. Today kids are commonly diagnosed with ADHD and mercilessly drugged, without considering the option of offering them sensible underwear, or decriminalizing essential bodily functions. In some schools it's considered babyish for 6 or 7-year-olds to wear briefs instead of boxer shorts. It's as though our society mandates the early development of an unhealthy, sadomasochistic fixation on genitals and eliminatory functions in order to mold reliable consumers who will respond favorably to sexually-charged advertising while hating themselves and each other. There are many anxiety-stressed adults and kids who might feel comforted and reassured by wearing diapers or training pants--doctors should prescribe them, lol!--the cost would be less than the average pharmaceutical prescription, by far, whether one chooses reusables or disposables. I wear reusables as a matter of practical necessity, comfort, and cost. I have been able to find amazing discounts on very high quality products by searching online (that's how I got here) and much can be improvised at little or no cost. I find wearing them comforting and reassuring in the same way and for the same reasons I wear a serious bicycle helmet when I ride--knowing I can survive an accident without serious injury or embarrassment. I find washing reusables easy and satisfying (I wash dishes, too!) while I find having to dispose of disposables problematic and distressing--I'm zero-waste and always prepared. I used to wear a disposable pull-up to bed whenever I had eaten anything at a pot-luck, but Covid 19 put an end to pot-lucks, so I'm saving them in case the next pandemic is cholera.
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I have had this fetish from the age of 4. I grew up knowing that I had to be the only one on earth who was so strange. I mean, who would ever want to like diapers?
When I was just a little boy I would sometimes cry, because I was afraid that I might have something really wrong with me.
And I knew I could never tell anyone else about my fears. Although I desperately wanted to confide in someone, I just didn’t trust anyone else enough that much. And I can’t even describe how it felt to be so alone and confused ...afraid of what was wrong with me. I mean, I had never heard of anyone else with my compulsion. So I tried to ignore it.
But as I got older, around 11 or 12 years old, I began to search for answers. And finding information wasn’t easy back then. It was long before google or the internet and I lived 20 miles from town, on a farm.
But every-so often, my mom would take us to the library in town and allow us kids to check out some books. Whenever we did, I spent a lot of time, attempting to find information about what was wrong with me.
Also, I had to be careful to not to let my brother or sister discover what I was hiding. So as a caution, I always had more than one book in my hands and I would find a table in the back of the library, where I could be safe to use the card catalog to look for any books by using references about diapers or unusual sexual desires or behaviors. I often did this for the duration my time in the library.
And I must have pages through a hundred psychology books, desperate to find anything that would help me to understand what the heck was happening to me. As I said, I had never heard of anyone else like me and I really believed I was somehow mentally damaged.
And this emotional baggage I kept hidden inside myself was considerable. I felt alone, ashamed, angry, confused, guilty, afraid and cheated out of having a normal life.
But after looking for information for a few years, I at least found a clue. It was in a book written by John Money called "Love Maps".
With my heart pounding, I must have read those few paragraphs repeatedly over a dozen times! I know it wasn’t much, but at least I found I wasn’t completely alone in the world with my desire to wear diapers!
I learned it was called a sexual paraphilia, a kind of deviant sexual compulsion that comes from early childhood experiences and because of that, it could never be changed.
Apparently it was hard-wired while my brain was still developing when I was still an infant.
I was a bit crestfallen because I had hoped perhaps to find a way to fix myself after I discovered what it was. But I did at least find some comfort with knowing that I wasn’t the only person on Earth that a compulsion to wear a diaper like a baby.
But I shouldn’t go into my entire struggle right now because I really just wanted to give a little background about my fetish before Asking my question.
Which is “why must I feel so much shame and guilt about having this stupid diaper fetish. I mean, I would have done anything, anything that was humanly possible to just have a chance to be normal like everyone else. I felt like a freak all through my childhood. And even now, I still carry this overwhelming feeling of injustice inside. After all, how could this be my fault? I was only a baby when this fetish was imprinted in my mind. Yet many people make it sound like it is my choice to just be a “sicko” or a “disgusting freak”. I’ve actually read posts online that said, “perverts like that need to be cured with a bullet to the head”. Or they think we are child molesters or want to be. Those statements hit me like a punch in the gut. And it really hurts to hear the negative comments despising people who are just different.
Even though I know that I shouldn’t let it bother me, it still hurts every time I read such posts.
I guess I just want to be understood a little. I never share this with anyone in the real world. But it is horrible to always keep this shame inside with nobody to talk to about it.
The truth is, I can't do anything about this compulsion to wear diapers but try to accept it. And that it is unlikely that I’ll meet anyone that would accept this part of me.
I just don’t know what to do about it? I know it is unrealistic to expect to change such a deeply ingrained fetish. And that I should just to learn to accept it and let go of my guilt and shame.
However, this is somewhat difficult to accomplish, given the aforementioned negative stigma people have with it.
Can I ever just be happy with who I am? If so, where do I begin?
I am sorry for getting so far into my problems, I hadn’t really planned to. Maybe I need to get some of this off my chest. Anyway thank you for reading.
C. Quinn-
Charles R Quinn I'm pretty sure I understand. Step (or lean) back into your eternal all-encompassing self for a minute--understand that the pre-occupation you feel so isolated in is in fact a universal experience that no one is able to convincingly deny. If you really want to feel alone, embrace it as a singular recognition of what is universally (however unconvincingly) denied--by self and others--along with every other genuine impulse a four-year-old might feel--the desperate need to follow a path in a forest, or the recognition of an authentic human being amongst a throng of zombies. Who would dare to be an authentic human being and risk attracting the attention of four-year-olds--? Think about this. We are socialized to sacrifice our true being, to surrender to sadomasochistic imperatives that offer only delusional compensations of superiority and dominance--or of submission as victims. Our entire civilization is based on the manipulation and re-direction of genuine human needs and impulses--and the suppression of love, intelligence, and understanding-- to ensure a steady supply of terrorized ciphers who will mindlessly enact whatever programming they receive. Those books you found were apologia for a state-sponsored religion of shame--"cognitive behavioral therapy" in the 1950's was a desperate (and successful) ploy to preempt the growing influence of Self Analysis (Karen Horney,) Dianetics/Scientology (L. Ron Hubbard,) and the "sexual economy" of Wilhelm Reich--today "sex economy" has been reduced to negotiating with prostitutes, and individual autonomy has been re-defined as "free choice" in an economy that regulates government, rather than being regulated by it.
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Charles R Quinn
Hello :)
I created this profile just to respond to you. I am sure you’re trying to find someone who shares this with you and hopefully you have, or can continue try to connect with people on other forums? Reddit, Quora, Yahoo answers? I have heard of this fixation before ! I know you’re not alone.
I don’t relate, but I feel for you and can imagine what you’ve had to go through.It is a bit strange to me, because I just don’t relate, but that doesn’t mean you should ever feel shame or guilt. Practicing love and acceptance is key to happiness. If I had a friend who came to me with this, revealing this story and the accompanied pain, I would accept them fully and support them through it, wouldn’t you?
Treat yourself like you would treat your closest friend. We often don’t love ourselves enough.
It is more than okay to be different, in a world where everyone feels they have to be “normal” , most people don’t actually feel they fit that mold.
You do whatever makes you happy, as long as you’re not hurting anyone or yourself in the process. It’s not a problem! :) Life is too short, liberate yourself and choose joy. I remind myself of this every day.
I hope you find the community you long for. You seem like a wonderful person.
All the best
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TM Thank you so much for taking the time to do all of that. I was deeply touched that someone would go through the effort you did, just to respond to my message. I cannot thank you enough.
I did not expect to receive a reply. When I wrote that message, I hadn’t intended to go on and on. I think I just needed to offload a lot of stress I had building up inside. But once I began to write, I found I couldn’t stuff it all back inside and it just flooded out of me.
I have had that happen to me every couple of years, for pretty much my entire life. I always feel better afterwards, and I’m able to contain those feelings again.
I sometimes really wish I lived somewhere less judgmental. And I am so afraid to tell anyone because it has the potential to destroy my life if it ever got out. Although, I don’t really know if that would be much worse than living with my secret. Always I’m always scared to death of being found out.
And I know my life is just passing by and I have never had a chance to be with someone who I could really count on, and trust enough to actually be myself. I think I am reaching a point in my life where I have to do something about all this. I can feel the emotions lurking just under my surface, building up pressure and eating me from inside. Right now, I can hardly see to write this message because the tears keep welling up.
I’m sorry, I am doing it again!! I just meant to just say thank you. I really am grateful, I’ve never received a more touching message. And I think your advice is probably spot on too.
One thing is for sure, I have to take steps to change how I deal with this shame.
Because it is becoming more than I carry by myself. And I’m so tired of repeating this cycle of hiding shame and guilt and then venting it when it gets to be to much.
Thanks again for your message and for listening, that was the most uplifting message anyone has ever written to me. I’ll never forget that.
Sincerely yours, Charles Q. -
Charles R Quinn dude she just asked for if anybody we're diapers 4 pdsd she didn't want your life story. Who cares what anybody thinks it's your life do as you wish please
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Rickey Z
I hadn’t meant to write that much, I was emotional and just had to get some stuff out. Sorry if I offended you. Thanks for letting me know not to share.
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Charles R Quinn
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Rickey Z you did not offend me hopefully I didn't offend you you have every right to write as much as you want it's just me there was too many words I'm not much of a reader laugh out loud
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Rickey Z you did not offend me or anybody I hope I didn't offend you for what I said you have every right to write as much as you want I'm not a very good reader way too many word for me sorry
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Obviously you have given this a little thought. Lol
I appreciate the reply and I share a lot of the same observations about the state of things. Most people really don’t see things that way though. So I just don’t really get my hopes up to high when I comes to someone who gets me. But I’m used to going it alone anyway. It is much less painful than being rejected or discarded just for having a unusual need to wear a diaper. I accepted the fact that I probably won’t find a match, and I have some measure of peace with that.
I still have plenty of things to enjoy in life to make it worthwhile.
Thanks for taking the time to message me, you are a good person! 😃👍🏻 -
How a diaper helps out for anxiety???
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Hashirama Pandey
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Hashirama Pandey
I could try to explain it, but I doubt most people would understand. But it is like a comfort feeling that nothing else in my adult life can give. It is like a connection to a time when you felt safe, secure and loved. Like when you are afraid and your mother held you to make you feel better.
I am finding it difficult to put into words. All I know is nothing else in my entire life has those qualities. I wish I knew other ways to get those feelings, but I have never found a substitute. And it isn’t from a lack of trying, because I was desperate to find a way to change that part of myself.
The shame and guilt I have carried from this compulsive desire is hard to manage.Yet no matter how hard I tried to just ignore the emptiness that I felt deep down from avoiding diapers, the feelings always, always comes back stronger than ever.
I just gave up on suppressing that need, and I now I am learning to accept it.
I hope that helps you to understand it a little.
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ME TO
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I will start by answering the question at hand. Yes, I wear diapers for a host of mental health issues mostly due to traumatic PTSD. Diapers for me are calming and a sense of comfort much healthier than psy medications. Diapers are not for everyone for everyone is unique and differ in his or her needs so what works for one doesn't work for another. But Yes many people dealing with mental health issues wear diapers it is just not in the forefront of many discussions. This topic is not a simple black and white thing there is much gray to it. describing in words how diapers help some people is challenging and difficult. It is purely emotional (a feeling a state of being). Diapers are calming relaxing allows me to go about my day with far less stress and anxiety. There is a comfort and freedom to them. I am sure my need to wear can be traced back into my childhood and the trauma i experienced but i do not focus on the why that is for my therapist to wrap her head around. do not beat yourself up over the why. what i know diapers put me at easy allow me to be more myself (out going involved social) and i am not walking around in a fog due to psy meds that have major side effects that cause more meds to be taken for the side effects causing side effects from those meds into sort of an endless cycle and psy meds can have long term damaging effects on one's body (hence you need to be monitored and regular blood tests to see what it is doing to your body). There are no bad side effects to diapers (just added skin care). i am not ashamed of wearing nor am i embarrassed by it even at the gym. It is no ones business what i wear as underwear under clothes. i do not concern myself with what people i see out and about have on as underwear so why should it be a concern for them what i am wearing. Our focus should be on accepting and loving ourselves with as little judgment upon ourselves as possible for there is where one finds happiness the majority of the time. those who want to pass judgment are those who need to take a good look at themselves. wear whatever makes you happy and if that happens to be a diaper than go for it and you owe no one anything explanation. hugs
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Please be more specific, is it hard walking to the bathroom or something? Are you in a wheelchair situation or it's hard to walk??
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